At the end of the year, a list will be made. Several lists, in fact. Making a list of the completed year is as much a part of our American culture as watching “A Wonderful Life” at Christmas and yelling at the television during the Super Bowl.

We’re a list kind of crowd.

In 2011, we’ve already had the round-up lists, tagging everything from the top 10 musical albums of the year to the top 140 best Twitter feeds. If a list of the year’s activities could be made, it’s been done.

Even though it’s way past the midnight of last year, one more list is necessary. Call it our Wish List, if you like. Instead of a bulleted account of what happened, this is a concise collection of what we hope will.

During our time outs, this is what we imagine will be the end of the year list for Christian media in 2012. At least what we hope. By December, we’ll know how right we were.

1. The surge of the back stage pass
   Ministries made a pivotal discovery. It’s a super secret, super effective, low effort, high reward method for connecting to their audiences. It involves a camera, involves walking it behind the curtain, and involves filming what goes on there. We called it the “Ministry 101: Unedited” approach. It created intrigue and intimacy with their audiences and was all the rage.
2. The time share technique
   This was a brilliant move by ministry media departments. How do smaller ministries afford television broadcasting, while also filling the content requirement? They join forces! That’s right. There’s strength in numbers. So several small ministries, seeing all the broadcasting potential, worked together to purchase and share a strip of airtime. One day, one ministry took the slot. The next day, another ministry. It opened television broadcasting to the smaller guys. Fantastic! Where do they come up with these ideas?
3. The online strategy
   It was so simple. So clean. Such a powerful move. Newer and smaller ministries, with solid content but lacking funds for high production, took ministry material to a new standard of authenticity. They knew production quality wasn’t everything. Content is. So they stuck to their strengths and produced online video that had everyone buzzing. Even us!
4. The language shift
   This was a simple tweak of phraseology. And it went over like…hotcakes. Or flapjacks. Or pancakes. Working to make their communication easily understood by broader audiences, ministries carefully deleted the “Christianese” language (words and phrases only Christians truly understand) and used words familiar to everyone. It was an easy change with overwhelming results. We loved it! In Christianese, that means, “We loved it!”.
5. The blooper real phenomenon
   Ministries made a mistake. Then they took that mistake and aired it. Excellent! Audiences love bloopers. They relate to life not always going according to plan. Crowds are begging for more.
6. The experimental year
   This move really paid off in the outreach department. With all the media options available for exposure, media ministries decided to test them out. What they discovered was greater exposure, broader ministry opportunity, and surprising success. We salute their willingness to step out of the box.
7. The craving for bite-sized portions
   Everyone loves mini sizes, from candy bars to communication. Shorter video content is easier for consumption. It’s been a year of soaring online hits.
8. The growing authenticity
   The cultural climate of 2012 has been all about being real, getting real, connecting to other real people. Observing that trend, the Christian media market has responded with less shiny, less scripted productions. The glam went down. The audience connection went up.
9. The year hope refused to die
   With the economy still wobbly and the world still wrangling, the future didn’t always look bright. People foraged for hope like birds for seed. And they found it. 2012 became the year ministries and businesses handed out hope like candy from their pocket, always ample and always wrapped in realism.

What a surprise 2012 has been! Who could have predicted such growth and evolution in the Christian media marketplace?

Geniuses. That’s all. Only geniuses.

In the future, cars fly. So do people, courtesy of a jet pack. Robots do all the menial labor jobs, like sorting our laundry and presoaking our dishes. And we wear fewer breathable fabrics.

Meet George Jetson. His boy Elroy, daughter Judy, and Jane, his wife, appeared in the early 60s and again in the mid-80s to give us a taste of what was coming. Or at least an imaginative idea. It was a hearty try at predicting the future, though robotic maids are still not in use nor charmingly sassy.

Foretelling the future has been exploited, expunged, and extrapolated since the first hour hand of the first clock struck the first minute. In the end, it all appears to be your basic guesswork. Some right, most wrong. In 1914, British government official Sir Henry Blake predicted the future rise of noiseless cities with brick, stone, and pavement replaced by rubber. In 1999, analysts predicted the digital combustion of all computer systems at the strike of midnight on January 1, 2000. In 2011, Harold Camping predicted the end of the world on Friday, Oct. 21.

Okay, largely wrong.

There have been predictions about Superbowl winners, about wars, about the human race becoming one-toed.

Why? Because people want to know what’s next. Having an answer is big money, keeping financial speculators and gypsies in business for centuries.

But what if we could know? What if, instead of conjecture, there was evidence? What if our culture, as rag-tag as it is, has actually been moving in a faithful, repetitive pattern since the ancient days? And that pattern made the future easier to predict?

What if.

Or you can call it the Generational Pendulum. It’s the theory of Wizard Academy’s founder Roy H. Williams, who believes western civilization moves in 80-year predictable cycles.

That means 20-years up, 20-years down, then 20-years in the opposite direction, and 20-years back to the starting point again. Like a grandfather clock pendulum. Back and forth. Up then down. 40 years in one cycle, 40 years in the opposite. It’s a never-ending motion in our culture that may determine everything from the chart topping song at the Grammys to the poll topping politician at the White House.

Explaining the theory, with panache and his legendary quirks, Williams wrote a book on the subject, entitled…wait for it…Pendulum, for release in March 2012.

To understand this theory better, however, we decided to go to a closer source, our chief visionary and CEO Chris Busch, a Wizard Academy graduate and overall good guy.

We met Coach Busch at a Barnes & Noble, via ground-traveling vehicles, where a nonrobot served him coffee and us water.

We would need extra hydration to talk about 2012 and beyond.

Us: Coach Busch, we’re so excited to be here. Also, that coffee smells really good. Moving on. We’ve heard about that Generational Pendulum theory. What is it exactly?
Coach Busch: Coffee is good. You sure you don’t want any?

Us: Yes. Absolutely. Water is so…waterlike.
Coach Busch: The Generational Pendulum theory is based on the idea that 40 years is the time it takes for transformative change.

Us: According to?
Coach Busch: One place is the bible.

Us: Ah, good source.
Coach Busch: The 40-year cycle is recorded throughout the bible – the children of Israel spent 40 years in the desert. When they disobeyed God, they served 40 years captured by Babylon. Saul reigned for 40 years, Solomon reigned for 40 years, on and on this time span has significance. In Roy’s theory, inspired by these and other 40-year cycles, there is 20 years up, 20 years down. That completes one portion of the cycle. Then 20 years up, 20 years down, that completes the other extreme. It takes 80 years to cover the full cycle.

Us: So there are two 40-year cycles. What makes them different from each other?
Coach Busch: One is idealistic, or the ‘Me’ cycle. One is civic, or the ‘We’ cycle.

Us: Can you describe them? Lets start with the ‘Me’ cycle. What can you expect when our culture is all about ‘Me’?
Coach Bush: The ‘Me’ cycle is a time when individualism is valued. People believe they can be anything they want. Duty, responsibility, those things take a back seat to self-fulfillment. Heroes are beloved. And competition is on the rise.

Us: When was the last ‘Me’ cycle?
Coach Busch: It started in 1963, peaked in 1983, and ended in 2003. If you look at the culture, you can see the ‘Me’ cycle emerging. There were alpha voices in the arts and literature in the 50’s. Then, in ’63, the Beatles released their first debut album, ‘Please, Please, Me’. Then you have the  indestructible hero, James Bond, who was also introduced that year in Dr. No. It’s also the same year Martin Luther King delivered his ‘I Have A Dream’ speech. This is the time of big dreams and big plans, like going to the moon. Which we did in 1969 while still in that ‘Me’ pendulum swing.

Us: Are there positives during the ‘Me’ cycle?
Coach Busch: Oh sure. The individual is valued. This is the era that Reagan’s rugged individualism took hold. During this cycle, we believe in ourselves. We’re optimistic. We achieve. The sky is the limit. But then, as in all things, it goes too far. Becomes excessive.

Us: So it peaked in 1983.
Coach Busch: Yes. You can see the excesses start about ten years earlier. Everything starts moving toward a very plastic existence. By 1983, you had Madonna and Kiss and outrageousness. That’s when it starts swinging back the other way and takes another twenty years to get there.

Us: Ending in 2003.
Coach Busch: Exactly.

Us: So now, after going from ‘golly, we’re capable’ to ‘forget you, it’s all about me’, we’re headed for the opposite cycle. The ‘We’ cycle, right? What’s distinctive about the ‘We’ cycle?
Coach Busch: The ‘We’ cycle is about authenticity. No phonies. No plasticity. No hype. We want real. Not that that’s what we get, but that’s what we claim we want. We believe for less, expect less. We tend to accept a lower standard of living because it’s the right thing to do. This is the cycle of fairness and equality. People with money should give it up, spread it around. Life is more pessimistic. Heroes fall into disfavor and what we end up with is the anti-hero, those who become a hero by claiming not to be. Those are the ones who are the most destructive.

Us: This sounds familiar.
Coach Busch: The last ‘We’ peaked in 1943, starting in 1923. This was the cycle of the ’29 Stock Market collapse. By 1931, people were working together to help each other through the Great Depression. Then Hitler and the war came. And people were united behind the war. The ‘We’ cycle is where we are now. We’re almost halfway up the peak, which comes in 2023. Then it’ll swing back down and end in 2043.

Us: So what is the cultural emotion during the ‘We’?
Coach Busch: If you think about the 60s Beatles. They were all happy. Hold your hand. She loves you. It’s nothing like today’s hip-hop, which is earthy, authentic, and often excessively negative.

Us: Goodbye ‘Good Day Sunshine.’ Now we know what is happening. But why? What causes this shift?
Coach Busch: Every generation is going to critique their parents’ generation. We think our parents didn’t do it right, so we’ll fix it. So the pendulum swings.

Us: Is one cycle better than the other? They both have their positives and negatives.
Coach Busch: Anything carried to extreme is harmful.

Us: Even caffeine? That coffee really does smell good.

Us: Okay, so we’re in the ‘We’. This obviously comes with a set of operator warnings. What do we need to be aware of? What are the pitfalls?
Coach Busch: The danger in the ‘We’ cycle is that it can get depressing.

Us: Sounds about right.
Coach Busch: People can lose hope that things will ever get better. They self-sacrifice to a fault. Sacrifice becomes so important, while individual achievement is not.

Us: That doesn’t sound good.
Coach Busch: We’re taught to love our neighbor as ourselves. But in the ‘We’ cycle, we can be too busy denying ourselves to love our neighbor. The danger is always in the extreme. We create a culture where individual achievement is empty. And one major cultural shift to look for is the witch hunts. In the ‘We’ generation, there are always witch hunts of one group or another. In 1943, another ‘We’ cycle, there was the extermination of the Jews. In 1863, another ‘We’ cycle, there was the Civil War. So we need to be aware of the cultural mindset to demonize and polarize.

Us: Don’t take this wrong, but this is could be depressing. For churches and ministries, how do they reach an audience who are feeling culturally negative? Being too positive won’t ring true and being negative does nothing but harm. What can ministries do? Anything?
Coach Busch: Of course. Your principles don’t change but sometimes your methods must. Especially with communication. The Apostle Paul, when on Mars Hill in Athens, had totally different methods than when he was in Corinth. He said, ‘I have become all things to all men, that I may by all means save some.’ He adjusted his method.

Here are a few ideas to tweak your communication method:

First, dial down the hype, not the hope. Hype will ring hollow. This isn’t the time for exotic dreams and    schemes. Small actions count more than those big dreams.

Us: What does that look like?
Coach Busch: Instead of trying to reach a billion souls, actually feed a hungry family. Small actions carry more weight than big dreams…in a “we” cycle.

Us: That makes sense.

Coach Busch:

Second, think more collaboratively, less autocratic. Your leading style needs to be more about “us” instead of “you”, the individual. People want to be connected, want to get involved. It makes them feel needed. Right now, they do not value a loner experience.

Us: This is positive stuff.

Coach Busch:

Thirdly, stress that this is only a season. We change and shift with the cycles. But God doesn’t. There are certain principles that don’t change, like seedtime and harvest, that all good gifts come from God, that He has plans for each of us that are for good and not evil.  Avoid the temptation of extremes and stress these things. And remember them for yourself.

Us: Good golly. We’re feeling very upbeat. Any other future predictions Coach Busch? Any flying cars in our future? Sassy robots? Shorter lines at checkout?
Coach Busch: I predict a cup of coffee in your near future.

Us: You never know, Coach. You just never know.

Bob Hope could twist everyone around his finger. All it took was one song, one “thanks for the memory”, and Shirley Ross was ready to reconcile their failing marriage in The Big Broadcast of 1938.

For 50 years, it worked on American troops, too. Hope mesmerized millions of military men and women with quick-punch jokes, a swinging golf club, and a rendition of that thankful theme song written especially for them.

He offered his appreciation. And it made a connection.

Gratitude works that way, whether it’s for something as big as thanking an infantry man for service to his country or as small as thanking a stranger for holding open the door. It holds a certain sway over its receiver. It soothes. It bonds. It pleases. It motivates. Yes, when used fittingly, it even manipulates.

Here’s how.

Everyone wants a pat on the back. Metaphorically speaking. Physically? Not so much. When given in earnest, an “appreciate you” can inspire an employee or colleague or car mechanic to work harder, help more, or fix your vehicle right the first time.

Getting you a free repair? We never said it worked miracles.

What gratitude can do, especially in the business world, is get more of what you need out of the work force you already have. It works like a team of Oompa Loompa’s, toiling away mostly unseen to produce amazing visible results.

Published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, a recent study by Adam M. Grant and Francesca Gino found that gratitude can actually double results. A group of 69 participants were asked to offer feedback on a cover letter for Eric, a fictitious character. After they did, half received thanks from Eric, the other received a neutral response.

Then, when Eric asked for additional help from these 69 participants, guess what happened. Out of those thanked, 66 percent were willing to provide additional help. Out of the not thanked, only 32 percent didn’t think he was a total ingrate and offered to help again.

So thanks works. But why? Why does it have such a sway? Does it make us feel better about ourselves? It is all about our self-esteem? Our self-worth? Do we hope to cash in on that gratitude later?

Grant and Gina found a completely different motivation. According to their results, it isn’t about self-esteem; it’s about being valued.

The participants simply enjoyed being needed. The acts of thanks convinced them the need had been real.

They are. Exceptionally so. These days, words are going for next to nothing. Even though saying “thank you” is always a good idea, it doesn’t hurt to take it a step further. Take it beyond words.

Consider budgeting a small “golly, I love my employees” fund in your annual budget. Nothing extravagant is necessary when extravagance isn’t affordable. It really is the thought that counts.

Mostly, anyway.

If even a tube of chap stick simply isn’t in your budget this year, give them time: an afternoon off with pay, an extra vacation day, two hours off every morning for a week.

In giving, you’ll receive a more contented, more motivated, even harder working employee. After it’s all said and done, who’s really giving more?

Thanksgiving is one of our absolute favorite holidays. We really love pumpkin pie, for one. No, really. Love it. Football is great, too. Mostly, however, it’s a chance to review all the things we appreciate this season. Below is only a partial list.

1. Jesus Christ. He always gets top billing. For who He is, for what He did, for a gift that far exceeds all other gifts.
2. Our clients! We think so highly of you, we brag on you even when we’re off the clock.
3. Thought Particles readers: This is a shout out to our coworkers in this employment of life. We love having you on this journey. And the ride is far from over.
4. Apple. The company and the fruit. We’re big iPad users and apple pie eaters.
5. Family. For comforting us when we need comfort, laughing at us when we deserve laughed at, and loving us when we’ll never deserve their love.

Next Thursday, as you sit down with your loved ones and a juicy bird, we hope you experience a day full of thanksgiving. That the green bean casserole doesn’t run out. That your favorite football team does you proud. That you remember the positive power of showing thanks.

Let people know they are needed. And if you’re feeling really festive, you can belt out a certain song by a certain comedic legend.

However you decide to show your gratitude, people will thank you for the memory.

In the beginning, the word was mobile. Jesus had a saying. It went something like, “Follow me.” For the twelve disciples, He meant that literally. Follow me…over there. Follow me…to the next town. Follow me…as we walk and I talk and you listen and learn.

And so they did.

The disciples moved with the message because the message, aka Jesus, was on the move. He was basically saying, “Lace up your sandals. We’ve got places to be, miles to go, people to reach, and in between times – class!”

Though that was a few years ago, Jesus’ ministry demonstrated a successful guideline for those in the communication biz. If you want to reach people, reach them where they are, i.e. on the road, at the well, in the synagogue, on the beach, even in the middle of a storm at sea, when necessary.

Pick your message up and put it in the path of your audience. And where IS your audience?

Everywhere.

Laptops were once all the rage. Right along with elastic belts and Trapper Keepers. It was the 80s and the first step in the move to mobility. It would take a few years to get over our teased hair and tethered networks.

Then the advent of Wi-Fi set the captives free. At least partially. Laptops lost weight, but gained muscle. And workers were released from their cubicles and workstations to kick back with coffee and jazz in local cafes. The world had been unplugged.

Sort of.

Wi-Fi could only let you run so far and be so free. You no longer had to be in the office but you still had to be somewhere. And Wi-Fi had to be present.

Then, riding in on the white stallion of cell phone towers, mobile broadband broke the chains and Smartphones resurrected the dead space. With their iPhones and Androids, users can now frolic from concrete to country roads, from skyscrapers to subways. With 4G and LTE technology providing the bandwidth, video content can also be accessed nearly anywhere.

We’re in the mobile revolution.

Online is now everything. It’s where you shop, socialize, communicate and congregate. It’s your individualized classroom. Your personal shopper. Your bookstore and clothing store and retail store and guilty pleasure. It’s where you work. Or waste time. It can even be your church.

And it can be accessed anywhere with a device the size of your hand. If that’s not go-go-gadgety enough, you can use a Tablet. Goodbye traveling with laptops. Hello a personal computer the size and thickness of a notepad.

The culture has gone mobile. Now finally unplugged and untethered, consumers show no signs of going back. With broadband’s video capabilities, there is no evidence of slowing the progression, either.

TBS, who are – if you didn’t hear – very funny, recently launched their own mobile App. Their audience can Meet the Browns, acknowledge that Everybody Loves Raymond, and check in at The Office on their iPhone or iPad.

Even Michael Scott can’t mess that up.

Though mobile video viewing is not YET the majority of consumer consumption, the trend is surging and will continue. The mobile video viewing market has increased 41 percent since last year and 100 percent since 2009, according to Nielsen.

Mobility is here and it’s not going anywhere.

It’s going everywhere.

Keeping pace with the hyperactivity of the mobile community may feel as fruitless as chasing a five-year-old, post chocolate milk shake. Can you catch up? How draining will it be to even try?

It’s easier than you might think. Less sticky, too. A few additions to your online media and you’ll no longer be running after anyone, five-year-olds included. Here are four questions to consider when gauging the mobility of your ministry:

1. Is your website mobile friendly?Accessing a website via laptop is a different world than accessing via iPad. Making an alternative mobile version of your website is like placing a welcome mat at the door for mobile users. It says, “Come in. Look around. I decorated this place just for you.” In the mobile web versions, scrolling is simple, typing is less, and accessibility supreme.

2. Is your video mobile friendly?Adobe Flash Player allows video consumption for over 99% of Internet users, so saith their advertising. It’s a different story, however, for Internet mobile users. The iPad and iPhone do not support Flash video, a large demographic you don’t want to alienate. So what’s the best format for mobile video? A real live guru told us, “Anything but flash.”

3. Is it time to create an App?This may be something to consider for 2012. Apps are becoming the right hand of mobile users. Also, sometimes the left. These nifty little programs provide a gateway to your content, with the path now uncluttered, simple, quick, and easily accessible by mobile devices.

4. Have you personally gone mobile?It’s time to get your hands, thumbs, and eyeballs on it. Learning comes from doing and doing starts at Apple…or Sony…or Google. Find the mobile device that completes you. Then join the revolution. Get on. Surf. Email. Download Apps. Watch video. See what you like, what you don’t, what sites please the mobile you, and what sites do not. Then you can guide your ministry with mobile experience, while watching Seinfeld reruns on your breaks.

In the end, much like the beginning, mobility is the key to reaching your moving audience. Jesus didn’t stand on a mountain top yelling, “All who have ears to hear, come on over,” but instead walked beside, before, and to his audience. You, also, will find more eager participants when you move toward them instead of beckoning them toward you.

Think of it as walking in the footsteps of Jesus. Yes, He also knows marketing.

For the first time since 1992 – the year Johnny Carson left the late-night stage, President-elect Clinton took the national stage, and Jack Nicholson stole the stage because a certain man in a certain uniform couldn’t “handle the truth” – fewer American homes own a television.

According to The Nielsen Company, the Advanced/Preliminary TV Household Universe Estimate (EU) for 2012 reflects a decreasing of homes with that familiar blue glow inside. U.S. homes owning a television declined from 98.9 percent to 96.7.

Not a free fall. Not a drastic drop. But a drop, nonetheless. A decline. A downward tick on a demographic that never goes down.

What does this mean? With the increased popularity of streaming video, the trend of mobile devices, movie kiosks dotting the landscape, and that all too convenient DVD-in-the-mailbox available wherever mailboxes exist, is the age of television getting unplugged? And if so, what does that mean for television ministries? Is this a good trend or a dangerous one?

Let’s tune in and find out. The answer might thrill you.

Other than the changing face of media consumption, there are other factors contributing to this television dip. For one, the economy. Nielsen notes the decrease in TV penetration started in the second quarter of 2009.

Hello recession.

For two, the digital transition. Not everyone wanted to spend money on a new television or a converter box and instead purchased a computer. If there was a time for a household to shift their media viewing preferences, that was the time. Nielsen noted a dip occurred right after the transition.

For three, you guessed it. Media consumption is shifting. There are laptops and iPhones and iPads and Rokus and Apple TVs and Google TVs and…sucking in a breath…we’ll stop there. Instead of the American public viewing their media on that trusty television and sticking to one viewing platform, they are diversifying. And how.

For television ministries, this doesn’t have to be bad news. In fact, with a little tweaking, this could actually increase message penetration. Tweak, however, we must.

The message need not change. This isn’t about changing what you say but the time it takes to say it. Television consumption is different than Internet consumption. Time is King. Or, at the very least, a brawny Queen.

Television has always been viewed as a destination. When a viewer sits down with remote in hand, they expect hour programs to last an hour, half hour programs to last half an hour, and commercial breaks to take two to four minutes. Viewers commit to time frames and generally stick with it to the end.

Internet consumption is nearly the opposite. If television is the destination, Internet is the journey. While on that journey, the viewer may decide on a whim to stay on the highway or take the back roads, shoot north or pivot southeast, drive at maximum speed or ditch the car and backpack across country. It’s an open road of information freedom. All buyer’s choice. They have control to stay, go, come back, go again. And, to add to the appeal, there is no time commitment.

You may get them to click on your video only to have them click back off again within seconds. Even commercials online come with a little timer in the corner so the viewer can watch those agonizing 30-seconds dwindle down.

If you are strictly a television media ministry, this is good news. Yes. Good. The jump-up and-down kind. Online streaming of your full-length program is still viable. Strike that. Viable and valuable. Strike that. Viable, valuable, and necessary.

Here’s the change part: It just can’t be the only approach to your online video presence.

In this case, yes it is. The web invasion means creating a multi-pronged approach to reach a diverse audience. It means continuing that stellar television broadcast, while adding web-based copy primed for viewers previously unreachable.

How?

Oooh…we thought you’d never ask.

Shorter is best. For a truly successful transition from television ministry to a television and web ministry, almost everything but your message must change. That means – in addition to your longer form content – producing videos of five minutes or less. Not 30 minutes. Definitely not 60. In fact, when we say “less”, we mean it. Three minutes. Two minutes. Think condensed. Think focused.

Make the moments count. Even though “time” is queen or king, tough to tell them apart, content is also royalty. Unless you have a strong takeaway, a truly meaty point or position, even a two-minute video will get clicked off within seconds. Internet viewers are information consumers. They are absorbing as much relevance in as short a time as possible.

So give them additional roads to travel, trails off the beaten path, beaten paths they’ve never seen, scenic views throughout the ride. Make it fun, relevant, creative, poignant. And, of course, brief.

Share and share alike. Enable your online viewer to spread the word for you. If they love it, they’ll want to share it. Make it easy for them. Create easily accessible links, as well as ways to share the video on Facebook and Twitter. Like a quick link. Or a share button.

Not only does this create ways to get your community talking about you, it gets them talking to each other. Relationships are then made.

If you speak their online language, giving them as much bang for their timed buck, they’ll visit again. With their backpack. With their walking shoes. With a glint in their eye. And the expectation you know the way to a beautiful journey.

According to a recent poll, the average American woman…we’ll just stop right there. There is no average. No norm. No standard for a female.

For every poll that says most women enjoy a night out, there’s a poll saying they prefer staying in. If one loves George Clooney, the other loves Jim Carrey. For every avid purse buyer, there’s an avid shoe shopper. For every credit card diva, there’s a woman with a perfectly balanced bank account. For every supporter of mayonnaise, there’s a believer in mustard.

In other words, one-size-fits-all only applies to t-shirts. And even those don’t fit so well.

To understand the complexity of the female donor, we asked the female expert Michele Miller, author of Unzipped: a portable guide to the anatomy of the female customer and founder of the award-winning blog, WonderBranding.com, to unlock the mysteries of the female mind.

Or at least do what she does best, unzip it a little.

We sat down on the information superhighway with Miller and shared an intimate email about how media ministries can understand, obtain, and maintain the female donor.

You mention in the very beginning of your book that women are “different”. This shouldn’t be groundbreaking information (who do we think posts on YouTube all those kittens playing with yarn videos?), but for many media ministries it may be. What are they possibly doing in their media messages that ignores this fact and could be stopping women from actively supporting their work?

I wouldn’t necessarily say media ministries are ignoring the fact women’s brains are wired differently. They just haven’t had all the information they need.

There are two aspects of communicating with women that every ministry should be aware of:

1. Women don’t think in the linear fashion of men, they think more in terms of a puzzle, or how seemingly different pieces of information fit together to provide information or a solution.
2. Women also have different value systems. They may arrive at the same decision to support a cause, but arrived there via different paths.
   For example:  You are raising money for a mission trip. Don’t just talk about the money you need. Give women a clear, rounded picture of the mission.  Some women will be attracted to the humanity (actual people stories); others will be attracted to the cutting-edge technologies used; some other women will be attracted by the trip’s organization.

We’re absolutely mad about bullet points. Can you give us the top five “don’t”s for ministries or charities when trying to attract the female donor?

DON’T assume women are a soft touch. They need to validate their contribution through information.

DON’T slap pink on your marketing and think that will attract women. Most women are attracted to bold, vibrant colors that symbolize life and energy.

DON’T get stuck in the rut of “passing around the hat”. Women want to see an organization that’s well organized and well versed in business concerns.

DON’T assume marketing to women is only marketing to women. She’s making decisions for her entire family.

DON’T fall into the trap of old-fashioned thinking about women. Some of the savviest women out there are CEO’s and owners of large companies.  You can talk to them straight without having to worry about losing their attention.

Since you are a woman – you mysterious gender you – what motivates you, Michele Miller, to donate your hard earned cash to a cause you consider worthy?

I tend to fall into two basic personality categories – that of the humanistic, combined with some of the guardian.  I am moved by stories of organizations that change lives and communities, but there are thousands of those out there.  What makes me pull out my checkbook is a sense that this organization has all its operational ducks in a row, and that the mass majority of funding is going directly to the mission (not operational expenses). And after I make a contribution, updates on the project (without constantly being hounded for more money) make me feel that my investment was a worthwhile one.  I’ll definitely give more down the road if that happens.

A 2008 study by Texas A&M University found that, while men gave more to groups closer to home, women gave equally to local, national or even international studies. They spread their financial love around. That creates a large pool of charities vying for the female donor. How does one stand out among all the rest?

As I said before, a charity has to work hard to get my attention.  Most charities don’t raise as much money as they could because they focus solely on the humanitarian portion of the project.  Those charities that operate like a well-oiled business and provide information about structure, strategy, and finances to a potential donor are the most successful.  That, plus promised follow-up reports are critical.

The best organization out there right now that’s doing this is Children International. I have been sponsoring a young girl in the Philippines for nearly five years. Communication is constant, and the organization is always sending updates (without asking for contributions). Because of this, I have increased my support threefold.

Marketing is in a constant flux. Is there a new evolution coming for marketing to women? And are they going to like it?

The evolution is here – social media.  Creating communities online is the key to success of any marketing plan, including charities.  Charities could save an enormous amount of money in postage and printing by developing an online community for their donors. Updates, and even conversations between donors, are very powerful.  Kiva.org is one of the best at this.

Just think about it – 32% of women who shop online say they trust the online opinions of COMPLETE STRANGERS.  Why wouldn’t that also work for charities?

Now that we have the top five “don’t”s, and because we’re still just crazy about those bullet points, can you give us the top five “do”s?

DO realize that women base their decisions on internal values, and that those values differ from woman to woman. You need to work very hard to create the whole picture for women, in order for them to contribute.

DO understand that the age of the Internet is just getting underway, along with communication technology now on mobile phones, etc. Now is the time to be creating communities and information delivery systems through technology in ways that are compelling and keep donors committed to the cause.

DO make your organization as cost-efficient and operationally excellent as possible. That is just as attractive as the humanitarian part of your cause.

DO work hard to bring donors together, whether in person or online, as often as possible in order to give them an opportunity to have conversations about what the organization is doing, and to offer suggestions for improvement. We’re talking a web-like organization here, not the traditional “top down” group.

DO remember that women control 80 cents of every dollar in North America.  By focusing on them as your major target, don’t worry about losing men…believe me, when men see a charity or ministry that’s growing and thriving, they’ll follow women donors right into the circle of success.

And, lastly, how will the current and ongoing recession affect the female donor? What can ministries do to help them stay committed?

The biggest thing ministries can do is to stop thinking of women as donors and think of them as a community. It’s not a “one-way ask” anymore. It has to be about conversation. Dialogue is key. A woman has to feel that she not only gives, but that she belongs. If she feels that, she’ll stay committed to the organization.

Thanks Michele. This is great stuff. We hope the marketing tips will be a great benefit to the ministries looking to garner committed support. And we appreciate you sharing your time and expertise.

As a side note, please ignore the pink “thank you” basket arriving today by UPS. We didn’t send that. We sent you a…um…oh look over there! It’s a cute kitten!

Ian Fleming once famously said that women “should be an illusion.” He had it about right. In the marketplace, women nearly are. More like mirages than matter. There they wait, out there, in the distance, unobtainable, and shimmering all the while.  Women are the cool, crisp pool of new prospective consumers. Oh the giddiness we feel at all the possibilities. But try as we might, neither the words we speak, the speed in which we speak them, or even a sturdy piece of Velcro, can attach them to our media message.

So you restyle.

You add posh elegance and alienate the girl-next-door, you add maternal tones and tune out the career woman, you tie on pink ribbons and are ignored by all the girls who loathe pink.

Whatever move you make creates an equally unproductive countermove. Like Newton’s law of motion with cute shoes.

The female customer or congregant should come with a master key, an algebraic equation, or a set of stereo instructions that – simply and without opining – make their motivations easier to understand.

How about a new language?

That’s what Michele Miller has discovered. In her book, “Unzipped: a portable guide to the anatomy of the female customer”, Miller says women are – wait for it – different. If you’ve ever been in doubt, doubt no longer.

That means obtaining, maintaining, and containing their attention takes speaking their language. And the translation comes in two easy to remember key phrases.

• Sources of Energy
• Time Horizons.

Master these dialects of the female language and they may not notice you’re a tourist.

Women are motivated externally, except for those motivated internally. If this confuses you, then you are most likely a male. Miller says women get their charge, their energy, their mojo, if you will, from either external sources, i.e. other people, or internal sources, i.e. their own thoughts and feelings.

To turn the head of the external girl, think people. She wants connection and feedback and social interaction. That could be as simple an achievement as making sure your phone number is visible and prominent on your website. Before she commits, she’ll want to connect.

On the other end of the spectrum, the internal woman wants information. Most likely, she won’t reach out. She won’t ask questions. Instead, she’ll read every shred of info you post on your website, on your brochure, on your advertising, and on your mailers. Make them available. Give her details and then give her time.

She’s processing.

A woman is timeless. How she views the world, however, is not. Her lens, Miller explains, has a time connection. She makes decisions based on whether she lives life “in the moment” or lives life to “leave a legacy”. And that makes her – you got it – different. “In the moment” girl thinks about the “now”. Carpe Diem, baby. She wants immediate results, immediate life. Living is happening now and that’s where she resides. Later isn’t her style. If you want her to join or buy or participate, show her what she gets instantly: spiritual strength, emotional freedom, a t-shirt.

Think now.

Miller gives an ad example:

Skechers – “Shape Ups”
Now you can get in shape without setting foot in the gym! Workout while you walk! New from Skechers…it’s Shape-ups, the newest in exercise equipment. Wear your Shape-ups everywhere and anywhere and your body will feel the difference immediately. Skecher Shape-ups are designed to strengthen back, abdomen, buttock and calf muscles, improving your circulation and reducing the impact on your joints and lower back. Today’s new walking shoes – finally you can get in shape! Skecher’s Shape-ups – your first step toward a healthier you!

For the “leave a legacy” woman, Miller says she views the world as bigger than herself, even bigger than her time. She wants longevity. What will she leave her children, her church, how will she benefit the world, the community, these are her motivations. Reaching her means showing the big picture. You could get her to plant a sapling now, but only if she knows her grandchildren will be climbing the branches later.

Here is Miller’s example:

Lincoln Financial Group – “Hello Future”
Will you spend your retirement in a comfy chair, watching the world go by? Or will you be out there, with your sleeves rolled up, changing the very shape of it? Saying, “Hello Future.” Call your advisor about the powerful resources of Lincoln Financial Group.

Don’t mix the messages, Miller warns. Speaking the time horizon language means separate ads, separate messages, or, in the case of website copy or mailers or brochures, separate paragraphs.

Otherwise, you confuse them both.

Keep it separate, however, and you speak to them both.

Ian Fleming must have known something about women. He created James Bond. A scoundrel, for sure. But never a lonely one. Fleming once said, “A woman can put up with almost anything; anything but indifference.”

Notice what makes her unique, speak to that uniqueness, acknowledge that uniqueness, and she’ll respond to your message, your request, or your invite to battle villains with apocalyptic plans.

Imagine yourself in a crowded room. A crowded echoing room. Its packed with people, stuffed shoulder-to-shoulder, hip-to-hip, nose-to-nose, and toe-to-toe. And every single person, every last one, is talking.

Even you.

Can anyone hear you? Maybe the more important question is, why would they want to?

Social media isn’t only a new venue of communicating, it’s a new mindset. Actually, it’s an entirely new world. It redefines how we listen, why we listen, and when we don’t. When you factor in the talking population inside the social media world, i.e. the friend requests and status updates and twitter feeds and blog posts, how can you ever stand out in the crowd?

Try avoiding this list of ‘don’ts’.

Don’t:  Hide your humanity.

The social media world is, first and foremost, not a business world. It’s a social one. People go to connect with other people. While your organization might be fascinating, it isn’t a “he” or “she”. It’s still just an “it.”

Instead: Create a persona for your social media presence. One to two people inside your organization should be your “voice.” This creates a consistent persona. Then think in terms of holding a conversation. Instead of social media merely being an outlet to distribute information, think of it as a way to hold a one-on-one conversation – with thousands.

Don’t:  Be perfect.

Ridiculousness happens to everyone. Murphy even made it a law. Before that perfect presentation, there was chaos. Before that stirring sermon, there was writer’s block.

Instead: Embrace the flaws. Show your audience who you are behind that curtain. Share funny stores. Or even embarrassing ones. Use this venue to be transparent, give them glimpses behind-the-scenes, or even just tell a joke, should the mood strike. This lets your audience know you are real. They want to be friends, first. Patrons, church members, followers, and customers, second.

Don’t:  Forget to take a breath.

The social media relationship is like any relationship. You need to know when to speak, as well as when to shut up and listen. Over updaters get ignored, much like over talkers.

Instead: Don’t be afraid of silence. Give your audience a chance to fill the space. Daily updates do not a successful media relationship make. Speak when it’s relevant and when you have something to say. They’ll respect you for respecting their time and space.

Social media allows you to develop something more with your potential audience, it offers a chance to create relationships. Instead of being in a crowded room with strangers, you’ll find yourself in a crowded room with friends.

And that makes it far easier to find forgiveness when you step on someone’s foot.

Millennials grew up traveling to the moon on a keystroke. Their first cell phone wasn’t connected to a bag. Their first computer wasn’t the size of the living room. They made friends in distant countries all before leaving high school. When they smile, it looks like this: :-)

They are as unique and diverse as the globe. So how can you reach them?

In Thom S. Rainer and Jess W. Rainer’s book, The Millennials, they asked 1,200 Millennials (born between 1980 and 2000) across the United States, “What is really important in your life?”

The greatest answer?

Family.

By 61 percent.

“Friends” received 25 percent.

No other answer scored above 17 percent.

Millennials may not be living like The Waltons, but their need for active relationships is core. Instead of giving a nightly shout out to John Boy, they update their Facebook status before bed. They may not know their neighbor. But they still have close friendships from childhood, though now living a continent away.

What Millennials want is to be connected. In everything. All aspects of life. That includes where they work, where they go to church, and whether or not they tune you in or tune you out.

Are you a business with Millennial employees? A church with Millennial members? A ministry hoping to reach a Millennial audience?

Here are a few ideas to consider.

Hiring a Millennial means willingly becoming a mentor. That’s what commits them to their work and that company. They want to learn from you, ask you questions, pick your brain, understand the dynamics of the industry – all of the dynamics, not only their piece of the puzzle – and have the freedom to toss ideas into the arena.

In other words, they want to be part of the team. Give them a jersey and send them up to bat once in a while. They may knock one out of the park.

Reaching Millennials means creating a personal relationship. They won’t be the generation that comes every Sunday morning, sits on the same pew, and passively incorporates church attendance into their lifestyle for no other reason than it’s a convenient location. They won’t tune into a daily ministry program simply because it’s there, either.

They need a reason. And their reason is always about their relationship to you.

Millennials want a church family, church friends. Think Little House on the Prairie. But with surround sound and indoor plumbing.

To reach them, they will want to know you. And that takes an intimate connection. Now is a great time to assess your focus on small groups and their community outreach.

Connecting to the Millennials needs to be two-pronged. You’re out there, in their medium, online and accessible. It’s a good start.

Media use to be monolithic. The television talked. People listened. That, however, is over.

This generation wants interaction. They want a conversation. And new media provides that. They text, tweet, instant message and comment on blogs and status updates. That’s part of their life. And you’re right out there with them.

Great. That’s the first step.

Now what else have you got?

Millennials connect with nearly everyone online. Their friends, coworkers, clients, favorite television shows. Everyone’s chatting in one new media venue or another. They are in mini conversations all day. 160 characters at a time.

So how does your ministry find relevance in the midst of a massive cultural shift?

You go beyond Facebook.

If there is a place in your ministry where real people connect, show it. If there is a building where real people gather, promote it. If there are activities happening where real people get involved, publicize it.

Millennials have an innate desire to interact with you. They want a relationship. They want to get involved, to connect, to contribute. Use your media to do more than distribute information.

Connect.

That means interacting through Facebook status updates, through Twitter posts, through YouTube Channel videos, as well as your traditional ministry program.

Once connected, interact. Build a relationship. Then invite them in. Millennials need to know you’re real. You’re reachable. And relationships are waiting.

Then when you meet them face-to-face, don’t forget to :-).